life path

The Power of Who…

Without the ability to leverage your relationships, you cannot and will not prevail.
Sometimes your relationships are
more important than your mindset.
The right people can help you get your mind right when you need it. 

Welcome back!

And to those of you joining us for the first time, hello there! I am so happy to have you here with me. (As you likely guessed from my exclamation points.).

This is the final installment of an introductory series on goal-getting; how to visualize an end and then hit the ground to make it happen.  If you’ve been with me a while you will note that I use words like deliberate intention and manifesting.  I say things like “Source energy” and “Spirit”, but at no point will you hear me say that you can will things to you without work.  I am a firm believer in the precept that “faith without works is dead.”

It is for this very reason that I have spent the last few weeks explaining the importance of clarity and consistency; personal identity; and how that identity looks on the world; the latter of which I broke down in two parts (click here and here). I believe it is imperative for us to understand all the internal and external elements of creating an abundant life.  I believe that we are supernatural beings having a natural experience, therefore we get our marching order from a Higher Power.  When we are solid in our identity, we become clear about our assignment and can be consistent in our actions. As we progress, we will encounter those who agree to walk with us. Some will temporary and we will serve them.  Others won’t stay long, but will be of service.  Others still will stay with us through many seasons of our lives.

Business consultant, author and public speaker, Bob Beudine, wrote a great book entitled The Power of Who.  The book attests that we already know everyone we need to know.  Now, with social media and other instant forms of access, we are fewer than two or three degrees of separation away from anyone we may need to know, which means that we know someone who knows them or can gain us entry into their circle. In short – you already know everyone you need to know.

I urge anyone who is looking to create a better life for themselves and their family to read the book.  Bob breaks down the different types of connections we have with people, from acquaintances to close friends. He notes that Jesus used a similar structure in his relationships when selecting to work with disciples.  There were those with whom he interacted occasionally (Barnabas), those whom knew of him and spoke well of him (the 200), those who knew him well (the 12) and those in his inner-circle (the 3).

Interestingly, including Jesus there were four people in his inner-circle.  I don’t believe this is a coincidence. In this group Jesus would be the Visionary, John the Builder, Peter the Implementer and James the Analyst. Indeed, you must have all four to outline a plan and see it fulfilled WELL.  There is something about all four perspectives with their varying talents, skills and abilities coming together that makes it effective and swift.

If, upon taking inventory of your life, you notice that you have a particular talent but you aren’t seeing the best fruits, I urge you to look at “the who” factor in your life.

Who are you around?  Is there enough diversity? Are all four groups represented? Are they represented well? Are you surrounded by frustrated, average or mediocre counterparts? Are you expending more energy trying to get everyone up to par than you are getting things done?  Are you missing counterparts altogether; lacking the resources and support you need to “Pass Go and Collect $200”? (If you’re not old enough for that comment, kudos for reading this, but go look up Monopoly then come back).

The point is, without people in your life – without the ability to leverage your relationships for mutual benefit – you cannot and will not prevail.  Your partnerships are as important as your mindset. In fact, I will even go so far as to say that in many cases your partnerships are more important than your mindset because the right people can help you get your head out of your butt when it counts. Choose wisely.

Want to know how to pick the right friends?  I’m glad you asked.  Join us next time, when we’ll be talking about just that very thing.  Ha!

You know I love you.  You love me, too.

Until next time, Mavericks and Mavens.

Live, Love, Laugh, Legacy –
Iscis

PS  – Where are you on your legacy journey?  Are you finally finding the kind of kindreds that make your mouth water and your toes curl (In a totally spiritual way, of course)? Are you seeing a pattering in your “people picking process”? Is it working for you? Something you need to change?  I’d love to know. Leave me a comment below.

Special thanks to Google and blogs.warwick.ac.uk for the featured image.

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Build It and Brand It

For some, [change] will mean falling into an entirely new category,
whereas for others it will mean operating in the same category but at a higher level.
Consider where you are and respond accordingly.

Happy September you Renegade Legacy Leaders, you!!

september_happy

As always, I’m glad to be here with you. I’m looking forward to wrapping our introductory posts, so we can get to some nitty-gritty application.  We’ve got just one leg of our foundational series, and then it’s off to the races.

Over the course of these past few weeks, we’ve been discussing the groundwork for creating and living your best life; in short, how to manifest everything you claim you want.  My goal of course, is always to help you build the best of everything for yourself and for those you love – and of course if it serves the world in the process, I’m all about it.

So with that said, we begin this week with the follow-up to our personality groups.  Last week we discussed Visionaries and Analysts.  This week it’s all about the Builders and Implementers.

Just as the Visionaries draft the concept and the Analysts revise the structure to make things better, Builders lay the framework for how everything will be done and Implementers make it all happen.   Builders set the goals, but Implementers are the brand.

I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating – it’s important to understand that everyone is important to the manifestation process.  A vision is nothing without those to bring it to life.  All parties represent different parts of the same body, the one machine.

Something else to keep in mind, no one person embodies any one trait in its entirety. As you grow and change, you can expect to shift gears and change directions.  For some, this will mean falling into an entirely new dominant category, whereas for others it will mean operating in the same category but at a higher level. Consider where you are and respond accordingly.  This is all about finding what works best for you, so you can your family can have a limitless legacy.

So with that said, let’s jump right in…

The Builder
Optimal Function: The only way I can explain Builders is to reference The Lego Movie. I cracked up when I saw it because that is precisely how I see Builders. They look at everything and see the plan right there before them.  They know all the parts and pieces and how to make it work.  A Builder is in her element when surrounded by all the other groups. If visionaries offer the why and analysts offer the how, Builders are the when.  They can tell you the order things need to happen in and who should be responsible for it.  The most successful businesses have Builders working as their COOs and people managers, they understand the importance of a timely launch and getting folks to buy-in.  When you see systems in place where people WILLINGLY give up evenings, weekends and holidays it’s usually because there are Builders at the helm giving them a reason to. If you’re a “Master Builder”, as they say in The Lego Movie, you don’t see things the way others do but you get the job done in ways they wish they could.

Median Function: Builders at the median level are typically missing one very viable component of their plan – the vision…the why.  A Builder who doesn’t have a clear “why” for what they are creating might be great at his job, but feels exceptionally unfulfilled.  A Builder without a solid foundation to build on is simply keeping busy.  Busyness is often the number one killjoy of Builders. Builders like to be actionable, they can translate an action plan into a measurable goal like nobody’s business. If you find yourself Building without a clear vision, stop and regroup. First, create an inventory of your skills and assets, then get on sites like LinkedIn, X and XX to investigate start-up companies and contract grantors in need of your expertise. Why spend another day unhappy and unfulfilled? You’re a builder…you make things happen.  Start with you!

Frustrated Function: A Builder of Frustrated Function (BOFF, not to be confused with BFF) is easily idenitified by his/her cyclical life. A Builder’s life revolves around how things work.  And a frustrated Builder’s life doesn’t work. Frustrated Builders are often running from something. A mistake made in the early days of learning their craft. As you can imagine, if Builders build – then a mistake for a builder could mean something fell apart.  In my experience, most frustrated Builders are often adult children of Divorce (ACODs) who were unable to “fix” their parents’ marriages.  They feel responsible for the dissolution of that union and the residual after effects. If this sounds like you, I urge you to look into some books about reshaping your ACOD legacy, self-forgiveness, and forgiving others. Considering finding an external support source; like a group, religious leader or paid professional. You’ll likely find as many have that “running toward that which scares will make it flee from you.”

The Implementer
Optimal Function: Before I get too deep into the ideal Implementer, I first want to take a moment to say that you guys (and gals) often get a bad wrap.  You’re loyalty is mistaken for misguidance. People underestimate your gall, your resilience, your tenacity and your shine. Folks don’t get how brilliant and forward thinking you are.  An Implementer operating in her prime is precisely why companies win awards.  You are the service-oriented, the people’s people.  Implementers are the bread and butter of any organization, the heart and soul of every industry.  Without you, there is nothing else.  Union organizers, labor leaders, picketers, protestors, those who march along in silence – you are the ones who make history.  You don’t follow the rules, you follow your gut.  When you see something that works for you, you buy in wholeheartedly and you make it work. You deserve to be treated with dignity and respect…and you know it.  You work hard and play harder.  You know the gears can’t grind without you and you make sure your employers compensate you in-kind – if not monetarily, than with flexibility, time off, benefits, and other perks. You aren’t working yourself to death, you’re working to make a life.

Median Function: If she isn’t at her best, an Implementer can get drawn into the montony of the routine.  She’ll start off bright-eyed, bushy tailed and eager but it will give way to lethargy, apathy and even attitude.  Before long she’s absentmindedly clocking in and clocking out, not giving much care to what she’s doing.  Have you ever been somewhere and that one person behind the counter makes you wonder how they have a job? It isn’t because their mom owns the shop or the hiring executive owed their uncle a favor; this MLI (median level implementer) is on the way out.  Sure, s/he will find another job but within months it will be the same old story. Sound like you?  Are you tired of hopping from job to job?  Do you have dreams of doing more and being more? Maybe working your way up to management?  Do you feel you’re being overlooked?  Well, SPEAK UP! High-achieving Implementers know how to get the job done and make things happen – that includes creating an optimal working environment for themselves.

Frustrated Function: Aimless. Unfocused. Chronically unemployed.  This is how you describe an IFF (implementer of frustrated function). A frustrated Implementer is often without work because they’re unastisfied everywhere.  There is always something wrong with the work space.  You can offer them $1 Million to do something they do all day fro free, but because their parking space is too far from the door it’s somehow not the right fit. Brene Brown offers amazing insight into the root of this issues in one of her discussions about blame.  Upon further review, I realized that this is the epitome of every IFF’s problem. Frustrated Implementers expend all their time and energy raging, venting and blaming they have none left to actually hold any accountable – including themselves.  Frustrated Implementers spend all their time talking about what’s wrong and who made it wrong, but never assume responsibility for making it better. If this sounds like you, I urge you to learn about setting healthy boundaries.  Perhaps you, like many of your “implementing kindreds” feels amiss, worth less than your other counterparts.  If that’s true, consider making some small changes in your perspective day by day.  There’s a great book called The Two Degree Difference, which talks about how small changes can have massive effects. You may have a strong desire to change some things, but you don’t feel like you can.  Begin with you.  Changing your mind will change your life. Go for it!

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So now that you know about the four personalty types, I would love to know where you find yourself on the spectrum? Are you already a visionary working at the pinnacle of productivity? Working your way up to saying what you need so you can be the first face of your company and the Implementer you were born to be?  Let me know in the comments. Until next time.

Live, Love, Laugh, Legacy –
Iscis

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Clarity and Consistency – Part 1

Where clarity gives you the foresight to see the final destination,
consistency gives you the wherewithal to make the trip.

Hello again Legacy Leaders,

Hope you’ve had a great week thus far. The last time we were together I talked a bit about how to stay focused on your goals…period.  I mentioned that we need to work smarter, not harder, by being clear and consistent.

What I did not discuss, however, was how to get clear and how to be consistent. So that’s where I’ll pick up today. In order to speak about gaining clarity in our choices, I must first speak a bit about what drives many of us – those of us reading this anyway – when making these choices: our legacies.

When building a legacy, we so often think about tomorrow that we put little focus on today.  We don’t take the time to really understand our choices or enjoy them. It isn’t uncommon for legacy builders to get so inundated with the task of creating a life for those we love, that we forget to live.

This doesn’t happen (as often) when you’re clear.

Clarity affords you the opportunity to not only leverage opportunities that bless your future and the future of your loved ones, but to also enjoy the present.  When done right, as you become accustomed to living in space of clarity, yesterday’s fulfilling choices manifest into today’s fulfilling outcomes, which in turn allow you to make fulfilling choices today that will become the fulfilling outcomes of tomorrow.

And just how do you get to such a state of clarity? It sounds silly, but “know thy self.”

I’m not talking about new age, psycho-phenomenal, humanistic way.  What I’m talking about comes from a deep, spiritual insight that can only come from connection with a greater being outside yourself.  I’m talking about knowing who are you and why you’re here; not because you decided but because you realigned with the innate, God-given purpose you were put here for.

As Steven Pressfield said in his book, The War of Art, “We can’t be anything we want.  We were put here for a reason and it’s our job to discover what that is and become it.”  That is clarity baby!

You can’t achieve clarity if you’re always immersed in the busy-ness of life. Clarity comes with turning off the television, putting down the tablet, silencing the phones and doing nothing. Absolutely nothing.

If you have never taken the time to sit still and just be, I urge you to try it.  I’m not talking hours or even a fifteen minute stretch.  If you can get five minutes of alone time before the kids wake up or after they’ve gone to bed, go for it.  Maybe you and your spouse can take a moment to do this together or even apart but at the same time. Later, you can discuss what you each discovered – or not.  It’s up to you.  The important thing is just to do it.  Once you start, you’d be amazed at how much time you can find to continue.

You need clarity.  We all need clarity.  We all want to be useful contributors to society.  There isn’t a personal alive who isn’t fighting to be more.  Even those who commit the most detestable and heinous of acts, when sat before a psychoanalyst worth their wright in salt, speak of some dream deferred that left them so hurt the only viable option seemed to be hurting others.

This is why we must be clear; because hurt people hurt people.  If we want our children to grow up to be whole, happy, healthy adults we must show them what that looks like.  We must take the time to be whole, happy and healthy.  If we want them to use our lives as a springboard and stepping stone for greatness, we must get past the first rung.

That requires clarity.

When you know who are you and what you are made for, you understand what works for you and what doesn’t. When you are clear about your purpose it will deter you from expending your energies on things that are not meant for you, no matter how superb you might be at performing them.  You’ll steer clear of what Gay Hendricks would call your Zone of Excellence, and  start operating in your sweet spot, your place of purpose.

Clarity breeds consistency. Where clarity gives you the foresight to see the final destination, consistency gives you the wherewithal to make the trip.  Once you know where you want to go, you make up your mind to get there.  If you’re still struggling with clarity, chances are you still haven’t gotten clear.

When you’re clear, you prioritize your actions.  You do those things that give you the most return for your investment – whether that investment is time, energy or money. You’re careful to stay committed to achieving the invisible, not-yet-manifested goal regardless of how things may look right now. This is consistency.  And though you can have clarity without consistency, you can’t have consistency without clarity.

So, now that I’ve belabored the importance of getting clear, how to do it and all its benefits, just how exactly do we create consistency?  I’m glad you asked.  I’ll talk more about that next time in Clarity and Consistency – Part 2.

Of course, I’d love to hear from you before then. Where are you on your journey? Been at this a while?  Just starting out? Let me know in the comments.

Until soon Legacy Leaders,
Iscis

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Getting to the goal

Some people think that planning is the same as preparing, but the truth is if you invest in a poor plan you’re still wasting your time. Being clear in your objectives and knowing what you want, then taking the necessary steps to manifest that desire is the epitome of working smarter and not harder.

We all want things out of life.

Some want basics like food, shelter, and clothing.  Others want an abundance, more than enough…overflow.  Some of us want to make more money or build better relationships, Others still are dreaming of new experiences or how to relate differently to the world in which we live.

In these scenarios, there’s usually that someone we talk to about what we’re thinking. Some of us will even talk to…I mean think aloud to ourselves about what we could be improved and how we could improve it. Unfortunately, we can become so accustomed to talking about it that we place no real focus on learning how to manifest these dreams. Or worse, we know everything we need to but, for whatever barrage of reasons, never take the action that ensures their fruition.

And it isn’t intentional.  Right?  Who sits around thinking, “I don’t actually want to be successful. Note even in the least. I don’t want to be fulfilled”? Who? “I have no issue with this constant yearning for more; this need to be meaningful and feel like I’m contributing my best to the world around me,” #saidnooneever. Well, at least no one I know.

We all want to feel full; to live life and not just watch it pass us by.  This became especially true for me after becoming a parent. When I speak to new parents, it’s often the same.  It is now very crucial to figure out just how to do be the best version of yourself.  Not because you want to be the perfect person or the perfect parent, but because you now understand that giving your child an example is so much better than the best advice.

Being your best will have unspeakable rewards for your life, it’s true – but there’s something about knowing that being wholly and unapologetically you will help them do just the same.

Be honest, would you rather listen to the person who has some great theories for creating the kind of life you’ve always dreamed of living but has never achieved it for herself, or would you rather follow in the footsteps of someone who’s actually done it? Most people would say they want the tried and true example; someone who can tell them how to avoid pitfalls and leverage opportunities.

The problem, though, is that even after you find someone who’s done what you want to do and can offer some guidelines for how to create the kinds of things you’ve always wanted to see in your life, there’s no guarantee that a) you will have the same kinds of outcomes and b) that you will want those things once you have them.  But I’m going to let you in on a little secret.

You can avoid expending all your time, energy and joy trying to achieve success only to discover you don’t want that version of success once you have it – or worse, never see it in the first place.  You’re only required to contribute two things: clarity and consistency.

Clarity and consistency can save you quite a bit of heartache. Being clear in your objectives and knowing what you want, then taking the necessary steps to manifest that desire is the epitome of working smarter and not harder.

Abe Lincoln is famous for having said, “If you tell me I have six hours to chop down a tree, I’ll spend the first six sharpening my ax.”  He was referring to the importance of preparation.   Some people think that planning is the same as preparing, but the truth is if you invest in a poor plan you’re still wasting your time.

The best way to prepare is to know your destination, and you can’t know where you are going unless you’re clear.

Granted, sometimes the beauty of the journey is in the route traveled, but even the most scenic route can become a complication if you don’t know where you’re headed.  I’m all for “getting lost” on occasion, taking a random turn just to see what’s down the road – but when building your life (and your legacy) you want to avoid random turns at all costs.

Now, I’m not referring to life’s detours – those unexpected  twists and turns you’ll have to navigate along the way. I’m talking about moments of seemingly harmless passivity that masquerade as “going with the flow” and “just trying some things out”, which in truth are self-induced sabotage and deprecation.  If you’re on vacation and want to give some things a shot…hey, go for it.  But not when you’re trying to build a solid life – to create something for the special someone or someones in your life – you need to be clear and consistent. Period.

So just what do clarity and consistency look like? I’m glad you asked.

I’ll tell you next time.   😉

Until soon Legacy Leaders!

Your Lady Boss, Legacy Builder, Mommy Maverick, Sister Friend –
Iscis

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