adult children of divorce

Build It and Brand It

For some, [change] will mean falling into an entirely new category,
whereas for others it will mean operating in the same category but at a higher level.
Consider where you are and respond accordingly.

Happy September you Renegade Legacy Leaders, you!!

september_happy

As always, I’m glad to be here with you. I’m looking forward to wrapping our introductory posts, so we can get to some nitty-gritty application.  We’ve got just one leg of our foundational series, and then it’s off to the races.

Over the course of these past few weeks, we’ve been discussing the groundwork for creating and living your best life; in short, how to manifest everything you claim you want.  My goal of course, is always to help you build the best of everything for yourself and for those you love – and of course if it serves the world in the process, I’m all about it.

So with that said, we begin this week with the follow-up to our personality groups.  Last week we discussed Visionaries and Analysts.  This week it’s all about the Builders and Implementers.

Just as the Visionaries draft the concept and the Analysts revise the structure to make things better, Builders lay the framework for how everything will be done and Implementers make it all happen.   Builders set the goals, but Implementers are the brand.

I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating – it’s important to understand that everyone is important to the manifestation process.  A vision is nothing without those to bring it to life.  All parties represent different parts of the same body, the one machine.

Something else to keep in mind, no one person embodies any one trait in its entirety. As you grow and change, you can expect to shift gears and change directions.  For some, this will mean falling into an entirely new dominant category, whereas for others it will mean operating in the same category but at a higher level. Consider where you are and respond accordingly.  This is all about finding what works best for you, so you can your family can have a limitless legacy.

So with that said, let’s jump right in…

The Builder
Optimal Function: The only way I can explain Builders is to reference The Lego Movie. I cracked up when I saw it because that is precisely how I see Builders. They look at everything and see the plan right there before them.  They know all the parts and pieces and how to make it work.  A Builder is in her element when surrounded by all the other groups. If visionaries offer the why and analysts offer the how, Builders are the when.  They can tell you the order things need to happen in and who should be responsible for it.  The most successful businesses have Builders working as their COOs and people managers, they understand the importance of a timely launch and getting folks to buy-in.  When you see systems in place where people WILLINGLY give up evenings, weekends and holidays it’s usually because there are Builders at the helm giving them a reason to. If you’re a “Master Builder”, as they say in The Lego Movie, you don’t see things the way others do but you get the job done in ways they wish they could.

Median Function: Builders at the median level are typically missing one very viable component of their plan – the vision…the why.  A Builder who doesn’t have a clear “why” for what they are creating might be great at his job, but feels exceptionally unfulfilled.  A Builder without a solid foundation to build on is simply keeping busy.  Busyness is often the number one killjoy of Builders. Builders like to be actionable, they can translate an action plan into a measurable goal like nobody’s business. If you find yourself Building without a clear vision, stop and regroup. First, create an inventory of your skills and assets, then get on sites like LinkedIn, X and XX to investigate start-up companies and contract grantors in need of your expertise. Why spend another day unhappy and unfulfilled? You’re a builder…you make things happen.  Start with you!

Frustrated Function: A Builder of Frustrated Function (BOFF, not to be confused with BFF) is easily idenitified by his/her cyclical life. A Builder’s life revolves around how things work.  And a frustrated Builder’s life doesn’t work. Frustrated Builders are often running from something. A mistake made in the early days of learning their craft. As you can imagine, if Builders build – then a mistake for a builder could mean something fell apart.  In my experience, most frustrated Builders are often adult children of Divorce (ACODs) who were unable to “fix” their parents’ marriages.  They feel responsible for the dissolution of that union and the residual after effects. If this sounds like you, I urge you to look into some books about reshaping your ACOD legacy, self-forgiveness, and forgiving others. Considering finding an external support source; like a group, religious leader or paid professional. You’ll likely find as many have that “running toward that which scares will make it flee from you.”

The Implementer
Optimal Function: Before I get too deep into the ideal Implementer, I first want to take a moment to say that you guys (and gals) often get a bad wrap.  You’re loyalty is mistaken for misguidance. People underestimate your gall, your resilience, your tenacity and your shine. Folks don’t get how brilliant and forward thinking you are.  An Implementer operating in her prime is precisely why companies win awards.  You are the service-oriented, the people’s people.  Implementers are the bread and butter of any organization, the heart and soul of every industry.  Without you, there is nothing else.  Union organizers, labor leaders, picketers, protestors, those who march along in silence – you are the ones who make history.  You don’t follow the rules, you follow your gut.  When you see something that works for you, you buy in wholeheartedly and you make it work. You deserve to be treated with dignity and respect…and you know it.  You work hard and play harder.  You know the gears can’t grind without you and you make sure your employers compensate you in-kind – if not monetarily, than with flexibility, time off, benefits, and other perks. You aren’t working yourself to death, you’re working to make a life.

Median Function: If she isn’t at her best, an Implementer can get drawn into the montony of the routine.  She’ll start off bright-eyed, bushy tailed and eager but it will give way to lethargy, apathy and even attitude.  Before long she’s absentmindedly clocking in and clocking out, not giving much care to what she’s doing.  Have you ever been somewhere and that one person behind the counter makes you wonder how they have a job? It isn’t because their mom owns the shop or the hiring executive owed their uncle a favor; this MLI (median level implementer) is on the way out.  Sure, s/he will find another job but within months it will be the same old story. Sound like you?  Are you tired of hopping from job to job?  Do you have dreams of doing more and being more? Maybe working your way up to management?  Do you feel you’re being overlooked?  Well, SPEAK UP! High-achieving Implementers know how to get the job done and make things happen – that includes creating an optimal working environment for themselves.

Frustrated Function: Aimless. Unfocused. Chronically unemployed.  This is how you describe an IFF (implementer of frustrated function). A frustrated Implementer is often without work because they’re unastisfied everywhere.  There is always something wrong with the work space.  You can offer them $1 Million to do something they do all day fro free, but because their parking space is too far from the door it’s somehow not the right fit. Brene Brown offers amazing insight into the root of this issues in one of her discussions about blame.  Upon further review, I realized that this is the epitome of every IFF’s problem. Frustrated Implementers expend all their time and energy raging, venting and blaming they have none left to actually hold any accountable – including themselves.  Frustrated Implementers spend all their time talking about what’s wrong and who made it wrong, but never assume responsibility for making it better. If this sounds like you, I urge you to learn about setting healthy boundaries.  Perhaps you, like many of your “implementing kindreds” feels amiss, worth less than your other counterparts.  If that’s true, consider making some small changes in your perspective day by day.  There’s a great book called The Two Degree Difference, which talks about how small changes can have massive effects. You may have a strong desire to change some things, but you don’t feel like you can.  Begin with you.  Changing your mind will change your life. Go for it!

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So now that you know about the four personalty types, I would love to know where you find yourself on the spectrum? Are you already a visionary working at the pinnacle of productivity? Working your way up to saying what you need so you can be the first face of your company and the Implementer you were born to be?  Let me know in the comments. Until next time.

Live, Love, Laugh, Legacy –
Iscis

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Visions and… Revisions

People change – so while this may be you today, tomorrow you could find that your direction differs,
along with the hurdles you’ll face and the actions you’ll need to take to overcome them.

Hello there again Legacy Leaders,

I hope you all are doing great.  We’re a little off-schedule, but we love that you’re here.

I am so glad for the week I’ve had, but there’s nothing like the weekend, am I right?  I’m looking forward to some rest and relaxation before I get back to planning and prepping for the week ahead.  It’s always great to stop and process what you’ve learned so you can streamline it into your process.  Hopefully, these posts are blessing you with that a little bit.  Stay tuned as we’ll be changing up the format a bit, to serve you even better.

We’ve been talking about clarity and consistency for a while and how it can come to help you live an abundant life. I believe those two keys are critical elements to everything else you want to achieve in life. In fact, I take the time to point out in Clarity and Consistency – Part 2, just how the two coming together enhances your chances for success.

Now, that we understand what we do about them, I think it’s time to move on to the creation process. What do we need to do to cultivate clarity and consistency in our lives and manifest success?

In my opinion, this happens in three parts:

  1. Know yourself and what you offer.
  2. Know what you need from others.
  3. Leverage your relationships (the exchange of giving what you offer and getting what you need) for mutual optimizations; think win-win.

Knowing yourself is about knowing what you were put here on this earth to do and having some idea of how you are going to do it.

purpose driven life image - fm land

Previously, I discussed four different types of people, how they interact with the world around them. I even touched a bit on how certain personality types benefit those who beat them, as well as others around them – even the world at large.  These are the Visionaries, Analysts, Builders and Implementers.

In this post, I will go into a bit more depth about Visionaries and Analysts.  In the coming weeks, we’ll discuss the Builders and Implementers.

Through it all I’ll do my best to offer insight into how you can overcome the obstacles often associated with the respective personalities to ensure that you find yourself manifesting the best for your life.

Granted, people change – so while this may be you today, tomorrow you could find that your direction differs, therefore so do your hurdles and the means you’ll need to take to overcome them.  With that said, let’s jump right in with…

The Visionary
Optimal Function: Visionaries are at their best when they are surrounded by their other three personality counterparts. Visionaries need the others if they’re actually going to get anything done.  They need Analysts to reel them in and scale back those big ideas so they can managed and achieved TODAY.  They need Builders to help them devise an actionable plan. And, of course, Implementers get the job done.  At their best, a visionary is like a body of water with many arms; they receive their pecking orders from the Source then delegate the responsibilities to the various parties; and of course there’s always backflow because Visionaries learn best from those around them.

Median Function: A Visionary is great at finding other Visionaries and Analysts. With a host of people captivated by their ideas, old and new, and to pare them down as needed, the median level Visionary feels invigorated and energized, but still gets the sense that something is missing. They know that other things need to happen in order to get their dreams off the ground, but they’re uncertain what that “something” is.  More often than not, the median level Visionary has to stop looking at “everyone else” as “them” and “they”.  Visionary at this level fare better when they understand the value everyone brings to the table; for instance, seeing Implementers as vital contributors rather than “the help”. If you’re an MLV (median level visionary), learn  to (appreciate and) play well with people different than you and you can surpass even your own grand standards of success.

Frustrated Function:  A Visionary without a vision isn’t alive. But a Visionary with a vision and no outlet for bringing it to pass… is a powder keg! Often narcissistic and entitled, the frustrated Visionary doesn’t understand why everyone else can’t see their brilliance. Their magnetism and charm will often draw folks in, only to have them pushed away just as fast with their sharp tongue and bitter wit. More often than not, the VFF (visionary of frustrate function) lashes out because of fear. Fear that she isn’t as good as she once thought; or that he isn’t as good as others have claimed him to be. If you’re a frustrated (and fearful) Visionary I urge you to spend time getting out of our head; preferably getting your hands dirty.  Garden, paint, play in clay, play with your kids, volunteer, dance naked around your house (or outside, just know your local laws about that).  I’ve found the time you spend thinking and the more you spend moving, you invite new ways to clear out the junk and let the sunshine in.

The Analyst
Optimal Function: Analysts, unlike the Visionaries, Builders and Implementers, can thrive working with one or all of their counterparts. So long as an Analyst’s opinions are respected and valued, s/he can thrive at any stage of the goal-getting game.  Analysts can help visionaries by outlining what’s working and what’s not in the overall scheme of things.  They prove useful to builders as a plan is being laid out, or even once it has been enacted.  Implementers can benefit from Analysts’ sage advice by receiving real time, quality feedback about how to make things PRACTICALLY better.  An optimal Analyst knows how to provide an honest, constructive assessment that will ensure results without making people feel picked on, put down or called out.

Median Function: At the median level, Analysts are often brimming with ideas for improving things, but lacking in tact. Median level Analysts are often considered cheeky, snarky, curt and even rude. These are the people who leave a bad taste in folks mouths not with what they say, but how they say it. While they are quick to offer a solution, their delivery is far from favorable. It’s like wrapping diamonds in a poop-filled pamper.  Sure, if you’re willing to do the work, you’ll get the gems – but you’re likely so turned off by the smell you never knew the jewels were there.  In many cases, the Analyst is right and has a sound idea of what needs to happen, but change is hard enough without complications and hurt feelings.  If you’re a median level Analyst looking to bump yourself up a notch consider enrolling in some free online communication courses or brushing up on some engaged listening techniques.

Frustrated Function: You know them well, the people who can see everything that’s wrong but never what’s right.  They have an answer (make that complaint) for everything with nary a solution in sight.  Frustrated Analysts have no filter and no boundaries. Often because they say the first thing that comes to mind, people don’t take them seriously and rarely seek their support for the one thing an Analyst wants to do more than anything – make stuff better.  My recommendation for the AFF (analyst of frustrated function) is this: Be your own project. Take classes, survey family and friends – people who’ll tell you what they really think even if you don’t like it.  Take their suggestions to heart and apply them in the field. This is what you do, you make things better – so start with you. In the meantime: Zip. Zap. Zeal. (ZIP your lips when people tell you their ideas. ZAP your thoughts onto paper. This helps when people want an immediate answer, you can read off your notes. Be ZEALOUS about making self-improvement your top priority).

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Now that we know a bit about visionaries and their revisionary counterparts, the Analysts, we’ll need to look at those who help them bring it all together – the Builders and Implementers, which we will do next time.

Remember, everyone has a bit of all these in their blood so don’t be shocked if you can’t peg yourself.  You may find in our next post that you are more Builder or Implementer than either of these.  Just be sure to consider them all and see which best suits at this time in your life so you can act on it and get the most out of it.

And as always, I would love to hear where you think you fall on the spectrum and how you’re using your gifts, skills, talents and abilities to create an amazing life for you and your loved ones – and bless the world. Leave a comment below.  Until next time.

Live, Love, Laugh, Legacy…
Iscis

Visions and… Revisions Read More »